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You can be a champion or a victim - it's your choice
sara kedge • 20 April 2023
There.
I said it.
It is unlikely to be a popular view.
Social media is full to the brim of how hard being ADHD/ Autistic/ Dyslexic/ Dyspraxic/ Dyscalculic is. Just go to reels and there are hours and hours of content highlighting all the ways life is hard for us.
That in itself is disabling. As if there is no way of changing it… we just have to accept our lot and sit in our pool of hard.
And that is crap.
Yes it is hard.
Yes there are things you will always find difficult.
Yes you are already exhausted by life.
And here is the tea, no shade… There are ways of making your life easier that don’t require you to life in a constant state of burnout and exhaustion.
It is possible to remove the frictions being a neurodivergent person in a neurotypical world creates.
It is possible to develop habits that support you to be your best and most successful self.
It is possible to be brilliantly successful and neurodivergent.
Now, I am not going to lie.
This does take work.
It takes experimentation (which means failure as well as success). It takes a desire and hunger to do different.
And if you are ready to do the work… an easier, happier and more successful life is possible.
Excited to share my journey as a neurodiversity business coach and my recent nomination for the Great British Businesswoman Awards. Dive into the transformative power of coaching, the importance of neurodiversity in business, and the celebration of critical thinkers in our community.
Hey gorgeous human: I am gonna drop the Tea on you today. I can’t believe I am saying this… “I spend too much time focusing on other people’s needs to the detriment of my own.” There. I said it. Deep breaths. I won’t be saying it anywhere else… it’s too damn embarrassing. It’s a habit I’ve had for a long time and is proving hard to break. Not least because I get a stack of happy brain chemicals from being helpful. And I like me a whole heap of those. But. I know that keeping this habit has limited me from consistently living the life I truly desire… To me this looks like having financial freedom. Having a healthy balance between work and pleasure. To be able to relax and enjoy the amazing people I have in my life. I am not giving up. There are habits I am developing that are working… and I want to share one them with you. Pressing the pause button. (also knowns as the “Shut the F Up” button) When someone makes a request of me, my previous behaviour was to say ‘yes’. To all and any things. Because I am nice. Because I like to be helpful. Because someone trusted me enough to ask. And... After saying yes, I often got a pang of frustration, irritation or resentment. I would still follow through because I am nice, helpful and someone trusted me enough to ask. This then ate a whole packet of energy biscuits even before I got to do the thing I agreed to… And... There is another way. It is okay when someone asks you to do a thing… to not answer straight away. Here a couple of stock sentences I find useful “thank you for asking, I will need to look at my commitments and will come back to you in a couple of days” “It is so kind of you to ask. I am not sure I have capacity at the moment. Let me have a think and I will get back to you” Now this is a bit of a shocker… It is okay not to reply to a DM or email instantly. It’s actually okay not to reply to them at all… If someone is asking for your time and attention, you have a choice on whether to give it to them, or not. Now, if it is a client or an order or the tax office… you probably do want to deal with that… Everything else is optional for replying to. It’s not rude. It is taking care of your energy biscuits. And we both know that these are often in short supply. I would like to invite you to come along with me on my journey… of growing habits that help us live in a way that brings us joy.
How are your energy biscuits?
What works for you?
What do you value?
I get it. More than you know
It sucks. All of it. All of the time.
(other than what works for you and your customer) Business set-up pop quiz? 1. You post daily on socials 2. You are consistent in showing up and working 3. You have a website 4. You have learned copyrighting/ info graphic design 5. You have a clear ideal client picture 6. You have all the motivation and attention all the time 7. You have a mailing list bursting with ideal clients 8. You have a comprehensive business plan 9. Your branding is on point 10. You bought and did all the courses and know how to run a business How did you score? 5-10? You are either wayyyyy down the track and have no neuro-spicyness orrrr have defo been drinking the Kool Aid. Put down the cup kitten… go take a break- you deserve it. 1-5? Welcome to the club. Which club? The one where we’re out here figuring it out, trying to get some money in the bank and not loose our minds in the process. Fighting the battle of “why don’t you just get a real job”. And being totally overwhelmed by the sheer volume of ALL the things you are told you must have RIGHT NOW to be successful in business. Now, I am in no way throwing shade on people selling courses, services and products telling you to get all these things in place… they all have their place… Lemme give you all the tea… THERE IS NO RIGHT WAY TO RUN A BUSINESS. Full stop. You do not need all the things right now. No doubt there are things that will help a business establish and grow faster… there are things that will make getting going harder… There is still NO RIGHT WAY. There is no must have. No need to have. Cannot start until… All you need to start a business is something to sell, and someone to buy it. Yet there is so much pressure to get all your ducks in a row before you start. And this is so overwhelming that you are likely stuck sitting in the mud and grub unable to do, well, anything. And that is hard. Really hard. What if you had permission to put this list of ‘must haves’ down and start running your business in a way that works for you and your unique brain? Contact me today to see how working with me can help you run your business the way that works for your unique brain!
What do I mean? Well, your brain is spicy. You may have curious attention. You may have different ways of taking in and processing information. You may have energy spurts and dips. You may have different ways of communicating with others. Yet the received wisdom on how to run a business means you cannot have any of these. Which means to run a business in the ‘normal’ way you need to squish your brilliant self into expectation on how you ‘should be’. And that takes a lot of emotional and intellectual heavy lifting. True story— nobody has the energy biscuits to do that. And even if you did… you would use all your energy biscuits squishing yourself into NT boxes and have nothing left to put your amazing out into the world. What if there was a way to set your business up that worked with, not against, your unique brain? [your thought] Excuse me? Hello? What is this wizardry of which you speak? What if doing that you were able to make more money? [your thought] Now you are talking silly… What if working with you, rather than against you had more energy biscuits and time to spend on living a life? [your thought] mind blown Radical thought eh? It is possible. And my clients who navigate into working with their brilliant brains do have more time, more business and more happiness.
